Your Best Regret
"seven gems"
That particular project needs work, or at least just another person's perspective to refine it. The same could be said with the "crazy" one, the soap one(s), the notes, the signs, the art even, and, the various drama sites with the opinion articles, or the... various more "tasteful" subscription services you provide, or any number of the other various assorted things I've stumbled upon and probably forgot almost as quickly, or couldn't say was you with abject certainty.
Don't get me wrong, though.
Would it mean anything if I said I... admire you, secretly?
But that I'm genuinely hurt, by your lack of trust and faith in me. That I'm jealous of you, and it's something which probably even causes me to hold myself back for some strange reason? That I resent you for not partnering with ME, and you instead just chose whomever it is you chose to work with, that has never been me.
I've had a lot of curiosity about these things, but never pressed you because I figured you'd fly off the fucking radar and overreact in a almost certainly pointlessly negative manner along with so many others. So I just left it all alone, though I do know some juicy aspects. ;)
I figured if you never told me when I was with you, you obviously didn't trust me with this for whatever reason. My assumption has been 99% likelihood of there being a 3rd party I'm unaware of, probably a web developer, though I know you've dabbled yourself in such endeavors, particularly since you got your lil genius buddy helping you 100% of the time now. Impressive, truly.
Would it mean anything if I said I do, deep down, really truly admire you? I admire you for your efforts, your willingness to "try", to give seemingly anything a good go, though I'm 99% certain it's not something you do alone, and in fact you might not even be the primary partner in some/most of it, or at the very least you didn't used to be, or I guess didn't always on your own? Idk, it's a jumbled mess within my suppositions and theories.
These are all mostly theories, truthfully, as it goes with these things, you're far more private most of the time, but understandably so.
Although, I will say that I think/have thought that your work would benefit tremendously with some genuine and properly structured feedback (meaning you don't get fuckin offended or upset for whatever potential reason). I don't mean this in a negative way, because it's impressive either way,
Some of the stuff I've seen you create is actually incredible, especially your speed and industriousness, it baffles me sometimes.
Yet, it so often seems like you're justtttt shy of your incredible potential (I know, you hate that word). Like, the amount of times that I feel the tension from your frustration creeping through in your writing tells me that you probably feel the same way, like you're always justtttt short of a significant breakthrough.
Sometimes you do make it, though.
Just mad ramblings, don't take it personally.
Unless... it's you? And it's you yourself, whom are the mystery party. Would explain much, though my sadness would remain the same at being excluded. No fun.
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May the peace, blessings, and mercy of God be upon you
Dear teacher, I salute you
good greeting
And yet
Your letter made me very happy
I was reclining and a session of appreciation and respect for your honorable position and your kind message
I do not want to say something to you that you might consider as a compliment, but I am used to being frank
Behind this letter, I see a sane man who has gone through all the trials of life
I confess to you and the admission of guilt is a virtue 1- I did not try to improve anything in fact, even my writing I describe in most of its stages as delirium
Its title is Bridges of Infinity
I wrote a lot, a lot, and lost a lot, both in the papers I wrote and in the online world
I don't even remember it anymore or care about it, where it goes, or what kind of reaction it is, right or wrong.
In the sense that I am fading away with it and do not intend to prove my existence
~
Dear Professor: Greetings to you
I am neither a good reader nor a good writer, but rather temporary cases that I write and then forget
But I admit that I cried while writing most of them
Sometimes circumstances force us to flee to another direction.
Away from the stories of politicians, the streets, and everyday concerns
Sometimes I get very addicted to the alphabet
I write it as if I was thirsty for its cold water
I eat it madly and then it does not help me as a treatment and I cannot hate it
~
My dear respected teacher
When I re-read your letter, I realize that you are a different person from those I knew in this imaginary world.
Reminds me of a friend of mine I met through literary forums on websites
He gave me so many lessons and I loved him with all my heart and wept for his passing
~
Dear respected teacher:
Whoever reads your post should be proud to have a teacher like you. We should be envied
Because you give us a pure soul and honest and clear speech
Clear as the sun
I did not turn down an invitation, nor did I get tired of literary criticism
But you would smile if I told you that despondency and misery have made me indifferent
Because reality is bitter and monotonous
We are not closer to the diaspora, but we are the same diaspora
Then I admit that I did not understand the intent of what I said about (work).
Because I often consider myself just a passer-by that no one may ever hate or love
Maybe I don't care and that's why life passes us by
As for the negatives that my tongue did not utter and my pen did not write since I was in this life
I often get backlashes and unflattering words, but I've never met him the same way
Every letter, published or unpublished, bears witness to my words
~
You are my wise teacher.
My dear respected teacher:
I never had a partner
But I wrote a lot, and being here by chance made me post, and I did not expect reactions, whether positive or negative, compliments or mockery.
The world of the web is a good world that has made us communicate, but it has side effects, and you know them better than me
It may leave a trace, but it is intangible in the sense of the feeling of paper, books, pen, or face to face.
~
Dear esteemed and esteemed teacher:
I am grateful from the bottom of my heart for your admiration and appreciation for my efforts and attempts to learn
But I admit that I never tried to correct any grammatical error or meaning,
But I leave it as it came in my mind, and here is a weakness in myself
Perhaps the extent to which I published my delirium and the blogger on my blog raises questions
And since you say (it's a muddled mess inside my assumptions and my theories).
Its really a mess but inside my posts and your questions are correct i.e. the writings are really messy for me
This is my confession to you
As for privacy, nothing is private as long as it is seen by the general public
Since I have nothing to hide, I write and forget
As for the reactions, I don't pretend they don't affect me.
But when no one understands the intent or the literary metaphors I use, I am often amazed
For example, to say on someone's tongue and address him, but I direct my message to myself and address it
But often literary metaphors, poor vocabulary, or lack of synonyms for language make it very difficult and the meaning loses its aesthetic or intended meaning.
~
Dear Respected Teacher:
Repression is sometimes the real generator of prose speech in its various forms, but it must be within the ethics of writing
But I do not like courtesy at all, and I forgive those who did not understand the meaning of the saying
At some point, a person feels that nothing is worth it
As for you, my dear teacher:
You are of great stature and a bright mind
Close in spirit
I would like to thank you from the bottom of my heart and allow me to keep your post on my blog
Because I will put it in my eyes
be fine
Thank you very much until you are satisfied
السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته
أستاذي الفاضل تحياتي لك
تحية طيبة
و بعد
رسالتك أسعدتني جداً
كنت متكئا و جلسة تقدير واحترام لمقامكم المشرف ورسالتكم الطيبة
لا أريد أن أقول لك كلاماً قد تعتبره مجاملة، ولكنني تعودت أن أكون صريحاً
أرى خلف هذه الرسالة رجلاً عاقلاً مر بكل تجارب الحياة
أنا اعترف لك والاعتراف بالذنب فضيلة 1-لم أحاول تحسين أي شيء في الواقع، حتى كتابتي أصفها في معظم مراحلها بالهذيان
واتخذت عنوان لها جسور اللانهاية
كتبت كثيرًا، كثيرًا، وخسرت الكثير، سواء الأوراق التي كتبتها أو في عالم الإنترنت
حتى أنني لم أعد أحفظها أو أهتم بها، أو الى أين تذهب، أو أي ردة فعل، سواء كانت على حق أو محبطة.
بمعنى أنني أتلاشى به ولا أنوي إثبات وجودي
أستاذي الفاضل : تحياتي لك
أنا لست قارئا جيدا ولا كاتبا جيدا، بل هي حالات مؤقتة تأتي أكتبها ثم أنساها
لكن أعترف أنني بكيت وانا اكتب اغلبها
أحياناً تجبرنا الظروف على الهروب نحو اتجاه آخر،
بعيداً عن قصص السياسيين والشوارع والهموم اليومية
أحيانًا أشعر بالإدمان الشديد على الحروف الأبجدية
أكتبها وكأني عطشان لماءها البارد
آكله بجنون ثم لا يفيدني علاجا ولا أستطيع أن أكرهه
أستاذي العزيز المحترم
وعندما أعيد قراءة رسالتك أيقن أنك شخص مختلف عن أولئك الذين عرفتهم في هذا العالم الخيالي.
تذكرني بصديق لي تعرفت عليه من خلال المنتديات الأدبية في المواقع الإلكترونية
لقد أعطاني الكثير من الدروس وأحببته من كل قلبي وبكيت على رحيله
عزيزي المدرس الفاضل :
يجب على من يقرأ رسالتك أن يفخر بوجود معلم مثلك. يجب أن نكون نحن محسودين
لأنك تمنحنا روحاً طاهرة وكلاماً صادقاً وواضحاً
واضحاً كالشمس
لم أرفض دعوة، ولم أتعب من النقد الأدبي
لكنك ستبتسم إذا أخبرتك أن اليأس والبؤس جعلني لا مبالياً
لأن الواقع مرير ورتيب
نحن لسنا أقرب إلى الشتات، لكننا نفس الشتات
ثم أعترف أنني لم أفهم القصد مما قلته عن (العمل)
لأنني كثيرا ما أعتبر نفسي مجرد عابر سبيل قد لا يكرهه أحد أبدا ولا يحبه احد
ربما أنا لا أهتم ولهذا السبب تمر بنا الحياة
أما السلبيات التي لم ينطق بها لساني ولم يكتبها قلمي منذ أن كنت على هذه الحياة
كثيرًا ما أجد ردود أفعال وكلمات غير مرغوبة ، لكنني لم أقابله بنفس الطريقة أبدًا
وكل رسالة، منشورة أو غير منشورة، تشهد على كلامي
أنت أستاذي الحكيم :
أستاذي العزيز المحترم :
لم يكن هناك لي شريك ابدا على الإطلاق
لكني كتبت الكثير، ووجودي هنا بالصدفة جعلني أنشر، ولم أتوقع ردود أفعال سواء كانت إيجابية أو سلبية، أو مجاملة أو استهزاء.
عالم الويب عالم جيد جعلنا نتواصل ولكن له آثار جانبية وانت تعرفها اكثر مني
قد يترك أثراً، لكنه غير ملموس بمعنى الشعور بالورقة أو الكتب أو القلم أو وجهاً لوجه.
يا عزيزي المعلم الكريم الموقر :
أنا ممتن من أعماق قلبي لإعجابكم وتقديركم لجهودي ومحاولاتي للتعلم
لكن أعترف أنني لم أحاول أبدا تصحيح أي خطأ لغوي أو معنى،
ولكنني أترك الأمر كما جاء في ذهني، وهنا ضعف في نفسي
ولعل القدر الذي نشرت به هذياني والمدون على مدونتي يثير التساؤلات
وبما أنك تقول (إنها فوضى مشوشة داخل افتراضاتي ونظرياتي).
إنها حقًا فوضى، لكن داخل منشوراتي وأسئلتك صحيحة، أي أن الكتابات فوضوية حقًا بالنسبة لي
هذا هو اعترافي لك
أما الخصوصية فلا شيء خاص طالما يراه عامة الناس
وبما أنه ليس لدي ما أخفيه، انا أكتب وأنسى
أما بالنسبة لردود الفعل فلا أدعي أنها لا تؤثر بي،
ولكن عندما لا يفهم أحد القصد أو الاستعارات الأدبية التي أستخدمها غالبا ما استغرب
فمثلاً أن أقول على لسان شخص ما وأخاطبه، ولكني أوجه رسالتي إلى نفسي وأخاطبها
لكن في كثير من الأحيان الاستعارات الأدبية أو ضعف المفردات أو عدم وجود مرادفات للغة تجعل الأمر صعبا للغاية ويفقد المعنى معناه الجمالي أو المقصود.
عزيزي المدرس الطيب الفاضل :
يكون الكبت في بعض الأحيان هو المولد الحقيقي للكلام النثري بمختلف أشكاله، لكن يجب أن يكون ضمن أخلاقيات الكتابة
لكني لا أحب المجاملة إطلاقا , وأسامح من لم يفهم معنى المقولة
في مرحلة ما، يشعر الشخص أن لا شيء يستحق ذلك
أما أنت يا أستاذي الفاضل العزيز :
إنك تتمتع بمكانة مرموقة وعقل منير
قريب من الروح
أود أن أشكرك من قلبي وأسمح لي بالاحتفاظ بمشاركتك في مدونتي
لأنني سأضعه في عيني
كن بخير
شكرا جزيلا لك حتى تكون راضيا
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https://aqelayash.blogspot.com/2019/08/blog-post_88.html